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0.11 Expressions
Fitrat

Impromptu writings on Shashwat Bulusu's Fitrat, written during an exclusive listening party before the release of his album.

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Expressions is Mysticeti's series for readers to share impromptu words and candid thoughts inspired by visual or sonic prompts. Distinct from short stories and artist features, it's a relatively open space where the words shared are largely unedited and meant to connect readers with the prompt, and with each other.

J-CARD by Nitendra

Track 1: Aaina

"Aaina" mirrors our self-perception, its scratches reflecting the scars left by insensitive remarks on our insecurities.

 

Track 2: Bhula Do

"Bhula Do" speaks to accepting unfulfilling aspects of life, wrestling with the choice to let go or continue despite the struggles.

 

Track 3: Tanashahi

 "Tanashahi" captures the weight and emptiness that come with dominance in relationships, longing for self-discovery amid control.

 

Track 4: Mausam

"Mausam" likens pain to seasons, reminding us that hardship, like weather, passes and gives way to something better.

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Track 5: Fitrat

"Fitrat" blends hope and realism, acknowledging the restless pursuit of meaning and the possibility that some answers may remain elusive.

 

Track 6: Exit Myna

"Exit Myna" is a melancholic close, symbolizing lost hope yet encouraging resilience and self-expression even within confines.

 

The album’s layers allow listeners to find their own stories within each track.

CARRY ON by Manavi Bhardwaj

Simultaneously,  

running through a tunnel of nostalgia—

a reel of clear and hazy memories,  

 

while also letting go,  

running freely through  

an endless spring field—  

the sun and gentle breeze  

embracing, dancing with me.  

 

The past and present  

in a state of static equilibrium,  

a pause,  

but also an endless flow.  

 

Strong and gentle words,  

the melody of tunes,  

bringing a feeling of  

acceptance, lightness,  

and a delicate nudge to carry on.

Reflections by Ragini Chawla

The poem written in response to "Myna", starts with the words about the bird’s friends flying away, leaving the bird alone. I then turn to writing about feelings of insecurity that creep up a person. In the end, finally learning from the bird that I can thrive within a community.

Flew away,

to fly away.

Take a flight,

on the beat of a drum.

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Times passed

and I am here,

on the floor with myself,

landing after having flown.

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And I saw the clouds,

I touched the sky,

I felt the fresh-high-altitude-air.

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Sometimes,

it filled me with an arrogant air.

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I breathed in.

I breathed out.

​An air of condemnation and jealousy.

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And the myna, teaches me to fly in a flock,

Lest,

she dies

and in her death

I breathe the final breath

of knowledge.

In the poem in response to "Tanashahi", I think about feeling heavy with emotions of leaving a home after many years. The emotions experiences, the mixed feelings felt and finally feeling a weightlessness where I am gliding through it.

Baatuni (someone who talks a lot)

Teri na mei bhi

Bhaari = full of weight

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My limbs can’t take the weight of this,

This,

Se-pa-ration

my body has overcome.

 

I turn into many alleys to find the strength.

Each turn punished me.

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With an emotion

that ruled over me.

With an emotion

that abused me.

 

I see the tree, that I see everyday.

I scan it, its crevices, its beauty,

so I can remember it,

after my departure.

For years.

For tears.

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And I repeat,

with the sky,

with the sand,

with the air.

 

I’m full,

of emotions, of data.

Full and heavy. I can’t move.

 

Yet, as I leave

I remain empty and weightless.

Reflections by Ritu

Shashwat’s "Tanashahi" reached me just as the rose-tinted glasses were coming off. The world seemed shabby and unbearable without it, and his album—his songs—really made it bearable, at least for the duration of the track. So, I ended up listening to "Tanashahi" hundreds of times. I clung to it like a rope leading toward the light at the end of the tunnel. His songs allowed me to embrace the darker patches more fully.

Your love is a punishment

To bear with it is an emptiness

To bear with a dictator you love and hold

In your heart, to keep the very ground

You walk on—

That is it, that is all.

It isn’t too big of a deal;

It’s just a difficult evening.

The darkness, my friend, is on its way.

I’ll be better there.

Innocence doesn’t heal the hurt.

The pain is like weather—

Constant, overwhelming,

Touching everything I touch.

 

It is just nature,

A state of being,

This imprisonment.

 

It is just nature

To ask for more

And not get anything in return.

 

There is no more to give.

EXIT-AVI by Arvind Pandey

I feel at ease, for sometime at least.

I love the drums.

I love the word "mashwara"

and "baatuni" is a new one in my vocabulary.

 

"Aaina" reminds me of my school.

The library was rustic,

I used to sit there all alone.

 

If this music were a place it would be

the well near my pushtaini ghar; all dried up.

Things don't last all that long.

I used to draw flowers

on the rocks and slabs beside it.

 

Many emotions,

and I'm trying to hold on to one of them.

The worst one is nostalgia;

the longing to live certain moments again.

If given the option, I would choose the past,

rather than the future.

Maybe I'm scared of creating new fleeting moments.

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"Ab ghoom ghoom ke aaunga

Ik Dard ka Mausam gaaunga"

I am slow dancing now,

feeling covered by the paintings,

I abandoned years ago.

"Saahas ki Khushi?", 

I think to myself

na mere mein saahas hai, na khushi.

 

Finally, "Exit Maina" -

maybe I will listen to it

when I'm possibly in a hospital

years from now,

with nowhere else to go,

accepting death,

letting my fists loose,

feeling no regrets,

accepting imperfections as they are.

 

I will be back soon with a better life, I guess.

MYSTICETI & FRIENDS

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Shashwat Bulusu is a singer-songwriter, producer and visual artist from Baroda.

 

Nitendra loves discovering new sounds and exploring stories behind the melodies.

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Ragini is a painter by education. Writing has always excited her as an annotation to her paintings, and in the last year or so, she has brought it to the forefront. She is interested in writing short, absurd stories.

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Ritu is a writer and reader from Kathmandu. She wants to write about music, movies and art.

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Manavi works in climate action. She enjoys creating free-form paintings and exploring community spaces in Goa, one of her many homes.​

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Arvind seeks to find intricacies in mundane things. Besides studying engineering, he engages in street photography and independent filmmaking. 

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